Sometimes I wonder if the title is the dirty little hook that makes more of you come over and read than you normally would? If so, then I bet your human curiosity jumped you right here faster than normal.
I hate to disappoint you, but I don’t have a sordid tale of marital unfaithfulness wrought with awfulness and redemption to tell you. About the worst side of cheating I’ve experienced personally was with a boyfriend in college who broke my heart into a million pieces when he told me he’d gotten some other girl pregnant and didn’t think it necessary to tell me about it until after the baby was a month old….on Father’s Day nonetheless. I think all I did was cry to realize he’d cheated in the first place and then lied to me for an entire gestational period, but what I’ve always wished I’d said was “well, Happy Freaking Father’s Day to you!”
I didn’t say that though.
And I guess the other time I’ve felt cheating glare me in the face was walking with some friends through an affair that one of them had several years ago. Next to losing babies, that was maybe one of the hardest things I’ve walked through in my life. I do want to add that particular relationship has spent years on the road to beautiful restoration…but I know that the wreckage of cheating can span far and wide. Our relationships with them, while still hugely precious to me, have never been the same…and that makes me sad.
But today…I am feeling like the big cheater. And though it can’t touch breaking of vows or months of long lies, I’m still feeling really horrible.